Next time you see a photo of an unhappy male face but can't place the source of your revulsion, try this quiz.

So next time you see a photo of a self-pitying male face but you can't quite place the source of your revulsion, do the quiz, below, and all questions should be resolved.

1. Does this sex scandal involve a man who is so lazy that when he decided to engage in some extra-marital behaviour he simply turned to the woman who was cleaning his bedroom?

If yes, go to question two.

If no, go to question three.

2. Does this sex scandal involve more national stereotypes than a Tintin cartoon?

If yes, go to question three.

If no, go to question three.

3. Did the man give the woman any money?

If no, and the answers to questions one and two were yes, you are looking at a picture of Dominique Strauss-Kahn.

If yes, and the answers to questions one and two were, respectively, yes and no, you are looking at a picture of Arnold Schwarzenegger.

If yes, and the answers to the previous questions were no, go to question four.

If no, and the answers to the previous questions were no, go to question four.

4. Are there embarrassing sexytime photos?

If yes, you are looking at a photo of Anthony Weiner (and hopefully just a photo of his face).

If no, go to question five.

5. Will these shocking accusations upset his wife?

If the answer is probably but she can't say now because she has sadly since passed away, you are looking at a photo of John Edwards.

If the answer is probably but she may not say because she is a Wag and they can be a very tolerant species, you are looking at a photo of Ryan Giggs.

Hadley Freeman
guardian.co.uk,