What motivates people to lie?

Do lies come in shades of gray, degrees, if you will, making some lying socially acceptable, even a virtue in the right social context? If so, who determines these parameters and what motivates people to lie?

"There is hardly a legitimate everyday vocation or relationship whose performers do not engage in concealed practices which are incompatible with fostered impressions," said the late Sociology pioneer, Erving Goffman (1959). Paul Ekman, a pioneering psychologist of emotions and facial expressions said, "Lying is a central characteristic of life. Lies can be humane; even altruistic. Some social relationships rely on lies to preserve the myths they enjoy" (1988). Case in point, Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy.

Ekman defines lying as a deliberate choice to mislead a target without notifying the intent to do so. He identifies two forms of lying: Concealment, leaving out true statements, and Falsification, presenting false information as if it were true. Ekman further identifies other, less direct ways of lying:


1. Misdirecting - Identifying an emotion but not acknowledging what caused it.

2. Telling the truth falsely, or telling with such exaggeration or humor that the target remains misled

3. Half concealment (admitting only half the truth) to deflect the target's interest in what is still concealed

4. Telling truth in a way that is opposite of what is said

5. Telling the truth with a twist.

Why we lie is fascinating. But why we judge is ironic.
By Jennifer Musselman / Psychology Today /read more